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 It may seem to some that it is a contradiction that a spanking can be at the time of its delivery non-erotic, but afterwards have an erotic affect on the couple. However, in our experience, it is not a contradiction. There are times when I spank my wife with the intent of expressing my dissatisfaction with either her behavior or attitude.
 The tone is serious and she will sometimes be tearful and appropriately contrite. Yet sometime later that day or evening we will happily find ourselves engaged in "make-up" sex. The sex is especially hot because we both find it erotic that I have the authority to take her in hand and that she submits to my authority. The fact that my authority to sanction her behavior is real empowers the whole dynamic of our interactions as husband and wife. Just because we happily end up in bed later that day does not undermine the disciplinary nature of the spanking that took place earlier. The discipline was real. Her tears and contrition were real. As Louise acknowledged when confronted by her angry husband:
 Oh god, this is real isn't it? He's really angry with me; he's really going to punish me this time!
 And then later reported:
 After he spanked me I felt, calm, secure, and suitably contrite, but the spanking on its own could not have done those things to me. He remained in charge of the situation, that was what mattered.
 IMO this is the reality of a taken in hand relationship. It is real because her husband used his real authority to sanction her misbehavior. It is real because she experienced the odd mixture of feelings that a woman experiences when placed over the knee of a genuinely angry husband who is about to spank her for her misbehavior. My wife feels the same apprehension before and the calm, secure, and contrite feelings afterwards, which in turn causes her to feel especially amorous later on. Nothing contradictory here; somehow it all makes sense, and deliciously so, when we end up in bed taking care of other equally important matters. Perhaps, after all was said and done, Louise and her husband experienced a seemingly similar contradiction themselves.
 by Stephen on 2005 May 7 - 17:11 | reply to this comment
 Glad to hear it --
 Hi again, Louise,
 Thanks for posting about my concern re your husband's comment. It's great to hear that this is 

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